


The Quest For Nutella

by Anonymous



Category: Men's Football RPF
Genre: Established Relationship, Fluff, Funny, German National Team, Humor, M/M, Pranks and Practical Jokes
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-04-02
Updated: 2020-04-01
Packaged: 2021-03-01 05:14:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,885
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23439781
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/
Summary: Manuel's jars of Nutella disappear. Shenanigans ensue.
Relationships: Benedikt Höwedes/Mats Hummels, Lukas Podolski/Bastian Schweinsteiger, Mario Götze/Marco Reus, Miroslav Klose/Thomas Müller, Philipp Lahm/Manuel Neuer, Sami Khedira/Mesut Özil
Kudos: 8
Collections: Anonymous





	The Quest For Nutella

**Author's Note:**

> This is the reupload of a fic I wrote in 2014. I took it down a few years ago with some other works because I wasn't all that happy with how my writing looked back then. However, with lots of people having to stay at home because of the situation we're in currently, I decided to put it back on ao3 just in case anyone wanted to read it again. It was all written in fun spirit and I feel like it's like we need right now. I won't be posting all the chapters all at once because I want to do some editing first so they'll be easier to read, but the fic is complete and I'll post all of it on here. Anyway, I hope you'll enjoy the fic :)

Philipp woke up slowly, feeling Manuel’s warm body against his own, opening his eyes briefly, but closing them immediately after as they weren’t ready to face the light of the day yet. He leaned onto his lover, cuddling a little more against him, as Manuel wrapped his strong arms around him, holding him close.

“Good morning, my captain. Ready to train with our national team again?” Manuel whispered in his ear, before trailing kisses down his neck, making him shiver.

“Good morning to you too, Manu. But if you keep doing that, we will end up missing training, and you know that it just can’t happen” He said weakly, but he didn’t try to get away from his touch. The things that could distract him from his duty were very rare, but Manuel was definitely one of them.

“Don’t worry, we still have time. I thought we could have breakfast in bed, what do you think?” Manuel asked, caressing his cheek, making the smaller man smile.

Manuel was already sitting on the bed, ready to go pick food for the breakfast, only waiting for Philipp’s approval.

“I think that I love this idea. Not as much as I love you, though.” Philipp answered, before kissing him tenderly.

“You know that you sound really romantic in the morning?” Manuel teased him, smirking.

“Shut up and go get breakfast. You’re just as romantic as I am” Philipp replied, the huge smile on his face betraying just how happy he was. The times when he didn’t have too many things to worry about weren’t that common, and so he wanted to enjoy it thoroughly.

Little did he know that it was going to end way sooner than he had expected.

It had been five minutes since Manuel had left when he heard him scream. Immediately, he jumped out of bed, suddenly more awake than ever. He ran towards the origin of Manuel’s voice, hoping that nothing too serious had happened to him.

“Manu! What’s wrong?” He asked when he finally saw his lover.

He didn’t seem to be hurt, and it was a great relief for Philipp. However, he didn’t like the panick he saw in his lover’s eyes. He was looking at their hotel room cupboard, well, staring would be more appropriated. Which was weird, because it was completely empty.

“It’s gone!” Manuel whined, suddenly sounding like a lost child, which definitely didn’t suit the strong and tall goalkeeper that he was.

“What are you talking about?” Philipp asked. For all he remembered, the cupboard had been empty when they had arrived at the hotel the day before, and they hadn’t put anything in it. The fact that he was still sleepy didn’t help, too. At least, Manuel wasn’t hurt, as he had been afraid of.

“About my Nutella! It’s gone, all of it! Someone stole it! We need to get it back. You have to help me, Fips, pleased!” Manuel exclaimed.

So it was it. Philipp decided that being angry at Manuel for bringing Nutella on national duty wouldn’t help to improve the situation, seeing how stressed Manuel was. So he decided to hug his lover tightly to help him calm down.

“It’s going to be alright, Manu, don’t make such a fuss over this. I’m sure you just put it somewhere else. I don’t think someone would have come to our room only to steal one jar of Nutella, right?” He tried to reassure him.

Manuel didn’t answer, and Philipp rose his head to look at his lover in the eyes. He was biting his lip, and Philipp, who knew him better than anyone else, after all, understood immediately why his lover stayed silent.

“Manuel, how many jars did you take with you? Two or three?” He wanted to know.

“Well, let’s say, more like, twenty or thirty?” The taller man answered, hoping that Philipp wouldn’t be too mad at him.

Philipp stopped holding his lover and facepalmed, because this couldn’t be real.

“I can’t believe it’s true. I have no idea of how you can stay in a good physical state with all the Nutella you eat.” He sighed.

“I didn’t plan to eat it all! I just couldn’t let it in Munich, in case someone decided to steal it, I thought it would be safe with me!” He explained quickly, knowing that he had to give his lover some explanations.

After that, he began to get dressed right away, a confused Philipp looking at him.

“What are you doing?” He asked him.

“I’m going to search it, of course! I won’t let anyone leave this hotel until I have my Nutella back!” He said, souding harsher than usual.

“But what about our breakfast?” Philipp asked, understanding that he could say goodbye to the idea of staying late in bed with his lover.

“I can’t have breakfast without Nutella! And I can’t let it alone with strangers!” He exclaimed.

“You do realize that you sound ridiculous? You’re talking about Nutella, not about your kid or something.” Philipp said, rolling his eyes, before yawning. Hell, he would give anything to still be in his comfortable hotel bed with Manuel’s arms wrapped around his waist.

“If you want to stay here, fine, but I’ll take my Nutella back!” Manuel continued, as if he hadn’t heard what Philipp just told him.

Groaning, Philipp began to put his clothes on too, because despite his weird obsession for Nutella, he loved manuel, and wasn’t going to stay in bed while he was surely getting in trouble with half of the hotel by waking them at dawn.

They went out in the corridor, and Manuel began to knock at the door of the nearest room. It had to be Mario and Marco’s, if Philipp remembered well and if he had had the time, he wouldn’t have allowed Manuel to do it, because he couldn’t picture one of them stealing Nutella. Mostly because when they were reunited for national duty, both of them were too busy making out with each other to think about anything else.

No one answered, which didn’t help to calm Manuel, who was going to knock even harder on the door, but Philipp caught his hand, keeping him from doing so. He had his idea of who could have stolen the Nutella, — it wasn’t that hard to figure out, really, after all, he had had to go through enough pranks from Lukas and Bastian to know that when something weird happened in the German NT, they were always behind it. — even though, for some reason, it wasn’t that evident for Manuel.

But he wasn’t going to tell him, because now it was too late to have breakfast in bed anyway, and it wouldn’t hurt Manuel to go through some rehab. Maybe he would even stop eating Nutella after it. Well, one could dream, no?

“It’s no use, the others are still sleeping, I’m sure.” Philipp tried to reason him.

“Or they know something, and they don’t want to tell me who is the thief, if it isn’t them!” Manuel said, looking suspicious. Suddenly, his eyes grew wide, and he stared at Philipp.

“And what if it was you? You could have stolen it while I was sleeping, after all you keep telling me that you want me to stop eating Nutella! You can’t deny that it makes a good motive.” He accused him, as if they were in some police TV series, trying to find the murderer.

Right now, Philipp wouldn’t have been surprised if the terrible duo had been working with Manuel, because he couldn’t believe that his lover thought that he had done this kind of things to him. He would never be able to lie to Manuel. He could keep some things silent for his own good, but lying was something different, that he would never do, especially to Manuel.

“Stop saying stupid things, I would never do that and you know it well. And if you used that brain of yours, you’d understand that after making love with you all yesterday evening, I was definitely way too tired to steal your Nutella in the middle of the night. Furthermore, you held me in your arms all night long, so I don’t see how I could have taken it without waking you up.” He whispered, not wanting the whole team to know about his relationship with Manuel.

He knew that some of them had doubts about it, but keeping the mistery spared them the teasing that Mario and Marco always had to face. Okay, the fact that the two were almost like Romeo and Juliet didn’t help them too, and he meant it, because Bastian and Lukas — them again — had decided to call them like the theatre characters, and it had taken them two weeks to get bored with it.

It was useless to say that Mario didn’t like being called Juliet that much, that Mario had tried to defend him, and that those two weeks had been a mess. At the end, even Philipp had to be careful to call them by their real names.

“You’re right, Fips, I’m so sorry I doubted you! But then, that means that the thieves must have stolen the Nutella while we were...”

Understanding that Manuel was right, Philipp blushed furiously, knowing that this was the beginning of an endless list of pranks. And he wasn’t ready to be called by any girl name. At the same moment, his phone rang, and he read the texto, Manuel being too busy rumbling about his Nutella to try to read it over his shoulder like he usually did, because he was just that curious.

_If you tell him what you know, we’ll tell everyone about you two. Even Löw. I’m sure he’ll be glad to know what you do with Manu before an important game._

Nothing told him who sent it, but once again, it wasn’t hard to figure. He deleted the message quickly, thinking that it was better to obey to Bastian and Lukas. Who knew what they could come up with if he acted otherwise.

“You’re surely right, Manuel, but we can’t do anything before everyone is awake. Let’s go back to bed, please.” He tried to convince him.

“I’m sorry, Fips, but I need to get my Nutella back. I can’t let the people who did this unpunished. And I’ve got a plan to force the whole team to get out of bed to answer my questions.”

Knowing his lover, Philipp had the feeling that it was going to be a very, very bad idea.

He was proved right when Manuel pushed on the fire alarm button, and sirens began to shout. Well, he couldn’t deny that Manuel had been right, now no one was asleep anymore, and Philipp told himself that it was a good thing that they were only members of the German NT in the hotel, and that they wouldn’t have to deal with some angry tourists.

He sighed, getting ready to face what was coming. He had the feeling that before the end of the day, he would have too many reasons to want to hit his head against the wall. But after all, it was how he felt most of the time when he had to play with the German NT.


End file.
